Emoticon Me

This is what I've looked like most days for the last couple of weeks. I don't want to be all down and negative, but if I'm going to be truthful these last couple of weeks have been some of the hardest I've ever had. Saying goodbye to your sweetheart for about a year is terrible. Having 30 days notice that it is going to happen is also bad. Not being on your prescribed Prozac makes it all worse.

Mentally, it's been treacherous. While I believe that Dave is going to be okay and we will enjoy a sweet reunion one day... that day seems soooooo far away right now. The anxiety I felt before he left seems to be replaced with a touch of depression now. The mornings are the hardest- waking up to realize I have a long day ahead and Dave is not coming home at the end of it.

I've been given good advice, and I imagine I will take it eventually: Stay busy. Get into a routine. Plan things to look forward to short term. Don't try to tackle a whole entire year at once.

Faith has been sick since last Friday. She fell asleep on the ride home from taking Dave to the airport. I thought she was just emotionally tired. Later that night she had a fever. She has had a viral sore throat for 6 days now. I feel so bad for her. Missing the first few days of school and not being able to get out and play hasn't been fun for her though she has been a good sport. This has meant a missed church activity, missed church, missed workouts at the gym, a missed dinner get together-- all of which were suppose to help ease the sting during this first week of separation.

So that's me feeling sorry for myself and my family. I hope to come back later and tell you of the the cherished moments we spent with Dave before he left and also the blessings that we are grateful for at this difficult time.

Got a loooooooong way to go, but I'm trying to work up to this...